I've been neglecting my blogging responsibilities

I intended on blogging every day or every other day, but the past few weeks have been a little intense and I have been trying to work through some things. I didn't want to come on here and completely unleash what has been going on in my head and my life because, well...some things are too personal for the internet. Anyways, things are looking up. Plus, I caught a nasty virus that has been going around and have been really sick since last Sunday, and haven't had the energy to come on here and post. I usually get these little annoying colds that slow me down a little, but don't stop me in my tracks like this one. I am still able to work out (light intensity) and go to work and school, etc. But, this cold hit me like a ton of bricks on Sunday morning, and is only getting worse. So, there goes my whole quest to "get back on track". I haven't worked out in 7 days and feel really nasty and squishy. I don't even feel like a runner anymore and am afraid for my first run back, because I know it's going to kick my ass. So here I am last week, training my clients and kicking their butts, while I know that I haven't even been able to make an attempt to work out. I look in the mirror and see every imperfection, every jiggle, every squishy spot. My muscle mass is going down, my body fat is going up and really, what kind of example am I setting? I know I am probably being too hard on myself, but I think back to the kind of shape I was in when I was training at 24 Hour Fitness, and I am not there anymore. It's sad when life gets too busy and stressful and it takes away from the thing that you love most, (Besides my husband and family of course), running and working out. I am always fighting an internal battle with myself regarding my fitness and health and overall appearance. I had an interesting conversation about this with my friend Casey at work last night. I won't elaborate, but it kind of opened my eyes to a few things. I want to be in the kind of shape that I was in before and I find myself increasingly more tired every day, and find it harder to do all of things I used to do. I don't attribute it to age, I think it's stress, it's beating me down and tearing me apart. I need to find my happy place. But, I digress...I am getting off topic.
So, I woke up this morning sick as hell. I worked till 12:30 last night and was surprised that I made it through. I work 330-12a today too and am really wondering if I can make it through the whole shift. I just got up to wash the dishes and had to take a break because I was exhausted and felt like I was going to pass out. Arggggg.
My plan is to hopefully shake this crap off and get back to working out and running next week. I really want to start racing again and get my running legs back. I love running and I can't loose touch with it.
Okay, time to do some homework...and there is a nummy grapefruit in the kitchen that is calling my name. I am craving the vitamin C like there is no tomorrow.
Thanks for reading my rambling babble.